Screamin' Snowman snowshoe race 2.12.6

Today was the Screamin' Snowman snowshoe race in Eldora. In attendance besides me were Matt who appears to have raced under an assumed name. !'ll be calling my CIA contacts and will let you know when ! hear back. Paul and his wife were there also to do the 5k. As you know, ! have mental and emotional umm...issues, so ! signed up for the 10k since this was my first time ever on snowshoes. Brett also was to be there for the 10k. He called Saturday w/ some excuse about his wife being ready to push out kid number 3. ! figured that after 2 practice ones she should be be able to handle it w/out him. Janelle (aka Mrs. Paul (tho' not the fish stick one)) explained the woman's point of view to me. Maybe his services are required. If it had been me, !'d have started just after confirmation explaining how queasy ! get in those situations so ! should just go race since passing out would just take attention away from her on her special day. Do ! need to remind you that ! have 0 kids, wives or girlfriends? Back to Brett. One of the tri club gals and ! had discussed him and decided he's quite the bastard. In the most loving sense of the word of course. ! don't want to mention her name. !'ll just say it was one of the Irish girls. That should be Farley oblique. Brett told me he got 6th in his last snowshoe race. 6th from last. ! would have stomped him today since ! finished 8th from last. Now for the other guy who knows how to charm his Significant Other. Paul and Janelle both finished @ exactly the same time. 1:03:22 for the 5k. What that tells me is that Paul still adores her and enjoys nothing more than spending time w/ her. Just don't tell me if it was her waiting for you Paul. Skip to the bottom for results. The rest is going to be about me. ! lined up next to pro adventure racer Danelle Ballengee who did her first race since ankle surgery yesterday and today got 2nd overall girl and 1st in her age group. The surgery was 3 weeks ago. The course was set up so girls and boys diverged 4 times during the race. To start we headed up the side of the bunny slope then onto the trail. !'d have run off and left everyone if there had been a passing line. Being able to actually run probably would have helped also. But other than those 2 minor problems !'d have stomped some serious tushie today. It was a long slog uphill. The first 2 miles were better than a 30 minute pace, but not much. Somewhere in there we rejoined the girls for the 1st time just after the $50 prime marker. Darin gave it to one of the other guys even though the guy behind me will swear ! was the first one he saw touch the sign. On the plateaus ! could run some and the descents were fun if a bit sketchy. Into the deep powder where, even @ my speed ! was kicking up huge rooster tails and it was all hitting me in the back. Just like if everyone ! know was armed w/ snow balls. Then the falling started. ! quit counting the times ! stepped on my own shoes or just misjudged how firm the snow ! was on was. At one point ! took off a glove and immediately stuck that hand 2 feet deep into the snow. ! didn't lose the glove. It came out half full of snow. Shortly ! intercepted the co-ed trail for the last time mixing in w/ 5 girls who immediately conspired to kill anyone who told that they ran w/ me. ! guess ! wasn't going to get to pee after all. It really reminded me of all the Danskin races !'ve done. If you ain't in the lead the scenery never changes. That's why ! race w/ girls. We got into some fast sections and they mostly passed me. Even the one in the pink striped leg warmers. ! stayed on them (! was "inspired") and managed to pass the whole gaggle on the last climb. Except for one. ! recognized the final section from the warm-up and really stretched it out. She was just too far ahead to make it all up. ! got 1:29:32 for 46th of 53 and top 20 in my age group. The one guy who didn't make top 20 was 11:50 behind me. They took my ID when ! borrowed the snowshoes and, Damn it, they gave it back. Brett had a boy or a girl. Don't let him try that excuse again ;).
Results are here http://www.racingunderground.com/ssresscreamin06.html